otakuskater's avatar

otakuskater

back to cross stitching
18 Watchers21 Deviations
4.8K
Pageviews

Motherhood

3 min read
A lot of people say that the reason why they decided to live-in with their partners or get married is because they're bored of being single. In my case, I'm tired of being left alone or being alone - as what I felt when I was single. I needed a distraction during the silence of my life. Silence because when I'm alone, I have no one to talk to. And because of that, I eloped, got myself pregnant, got married, gave birth, raised my son with my husband and parents... and then, I noticed how time went by so fast that I missed Akio's movements in my womb. Right now, I noticed that his tall body will outgrow the crib where I placed him after putting him to sleep.

For a year I tried to destroy my slowpoke actions. I felt like I was born at the wrong timeline. It took me hours just to wash bottles, do the hand washing of laundry, dish washing, and confused when I'm being ordered by my parents while I had a task in my hand that I forgot to go back to. Sigh! But one thing that made me turn back time is doing cross stitching once more. This hobby can be pursued while my son sleeps or busy playing his toys. Things that I used were easy to hide when I have to attend at a finally awaken rascal. I might need an art studio if I go back to painting and will have a hard time to look after him while I skate or teach any first timers on ice. And even though I want to go back to being a volunteer at AAP, I have to wait for my son to grow up and let him decide if he likes anime, skating or not at all. I hope he will.

My husband may not be perfect, but he loves me. Even though he has to live with my in-laws for working in a place that's a walking distance, he would visit my son and I during his day off. I love the way he bonds with me and my son, with me and with my son. He may have his flaws, but I learned to love when I know his reason. I could not reason with my parents, but I could reason with him. I can pour a dam of tears that I kept like a volcano would. He's there for me to hold on to while I cry on his shoulder.
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In

Shock

2 min read
Dear Shiro,

I want to say how I regretted the years of my depression, or if only I didn't stop checking DA last 2006 up to now. If Kilroy didn't chat with me through YM today, it might be much more later for me to know what happened.

My mother-in-law is there also, who passed away last May 30. So I was not able to get in touch through the anime community, DA and Facebook. I couldn't believe that right now, I'm grieving and reminiscing (while crying) the EB at Comic Alley, how you introduced me to DA, how Jeiro started the FB if it weren't for her post at Questor magazine, the Anime Asylum, and so on.

Hope you get to see Nanay Edna there for she's also a very good mother to me.

I will never forget you. May you rest in peace. Amen.

Heiwa of penpals
otakuskater of gaiaonline, mydivadoll, pinoyhenyo
Irene Jean Cabalquinto Espinosa on facebook

~For those who have my fbs (friend books), you may keep them. I already moved our of Fort Bonifacio and now residing at a new place. I already stopped writing through snail mails because I'm focusing at raising my son.
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In

May 2008

1 min read
Since lagging hours put me away from deviantart  *plus the most sad part of not being able to get back my old spirited self* I lost myself in a cold wind of doubt, desperation, boredom, loneliness, and pain. It would be hard for my parents to accept my true identity, being the natural lolita. I'm a child at heart with a childlike nature inside and out. Few people can accept and understand what I've been going through, although, for the rest of the outside world, I weird to them. For all I know, it's killing me when I'm afraid that I'll turn out into an old maid. I might sound crazy to anyone who reads this, but this is the real me. I still can't move on...
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In

urgent

1 min read
i lost my cell phone. my # +639176241749 is now cut.
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In

the love month

1 min read
of course i can't ask for a... rock song to play along the speaker while i skate... therefore, i decided to look for a videoke bar to sing along while recording a song i would sing along.

anyway, that's why i decided to ring in ym to sing my own passion in lullaby *of noir* and first love *of utada hikaru* to my special love one.

to do something while i wait for the assist coaches and clients to come, i played along with chelcie on the ice to build the i :heart: u rightthere on the ice and take a shot with her cell cam...

darn! that's what i'll do when i finally got my cell cam...
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In
Featured

Motherhood by otakuskater, journal

Shock by otakuskater, journal

May 2008 by otakuskater, journal

urgent by otakuskater, journal

the love month by otakuskater, journal