Since lagging hours put me away from deviantart *plus the most sad part of not being able to get back my old spirited self* I lost myself in a cold wind of doubt, desperation, boredom, loneliness, and pain. It would be hard for my parents to accept my true identity, being the natural lolita. I'm a child at heart with a childlike nature inside and out. Few people can accept and understand what I've been going through, although, for the rest of the outside world, I weird to them. For all I know, it's killing me when I'm afraid that I'll turn out into an old maid. I might sound crazy to anyone who reads this, but this is the real me. I still can't move on...